With the 2012 Presidential Election in our rear view mirrors, and the North Korea crazy talk river finally starting to cress, it’s time we turned our attention back to the task at hand: outfitting your Windows Phone with the best applications we can possibly find. Today’s scenario? Escaping the suffocating stench of Super Bowl Weekend.
First, let me be clear, this isn’t to say that anyone or anything related to the United States’ biggest sports event of the year actually stinks, we’ve never made it close enough to any of them to find out first hand. No, what stinks is that for the next week we’ll all have to put up with non-stop verbal recaps of play, complete with “can you believe that?” We’ll be forced to listen to any old non-sports inclined individual talk about the commercials that aired and how Destiny’s Child shouldn’t have been picked as part of the half time show.
So, say you forgot the big game was this weekend and decided to go out to your favorite watering hole. Now, your friends are there and you think they’ll take offense to you wanting to get out of the building as soon as humanly possible. How about you stay, and give DoubleTap Software’s Touchdown Run a go to help you get in the gridiron spirit. Simply win but dragging your player to the end zone while avoiding your opposing defenders. Simple, fun, and at a cost of $0, you can’t beat it with a stick. (While we’re at it, this weekend might be a bad time to have sticks in the house. I’ve heard stories of people getting excited during the game and accidentally smashing their televisions.)
There’s getting into the spirit, and then there’s completely ignoring the spirit and trying to pretend that you’re actually interested. Now, I’m not saying that your best friend or significant other won’t be bothered by you using Nokia Pulse Beta to complete tune out their sports banter for the warm embrace of messaging your friends and family about things you’d rather be doing. What I am saying is that with features like auto tracking your locations and reviews for local places, when you have inevitably had enough of John Madden wannabes saying incredibly mundane things like “the other team just to want it more in the second half”, you’ll thank me. Pulse is free to all, and now available on all Windows Phone devices.
Finally, just as there are women who talk about sports in an effort to impress men, so too is a new phenomenon sweeping Super Bowl parties across the nation like indigestion and Lay’s potato chip crumbs. According to my sources, there is a growing number of men who go to bars looking to impress women on how much they know about The House that Manning Built. For you brave pioneers I can only offer you my encouragement and the free and nifty Pickup Lines app currently available in the Windows Phone Store. At no point should you make this app your go to place for phrases like “I wanna bag you like some groceries.” But, maybe an aptly modified “I wanna sack you like some over aggressive defender” or “Can we go back to my end zone and score a few points?” will do the trick. Of course, they may also get you killed in some states so user discretion is advised. For the record, I came up with those all by my lonesome.
That’s all I’ve got for you this week sports fans and pigskin aficionados. Join us next week as we break out the champagne for the final Windows Phone App Flow. It’s going to be one hell of a swan song. Until then, tell me more about that apps you use every day over on Twitter, or in the comments below. Also remember, it’s not how you play the game, it’s how the people at home in the armchair eating chili dogs think you played the game.